I was feeding them supper one evening last week
and I was slouching exhausted in my chair.
I was counting the hours till the day would end
When they’d be sleeping and out of my hair.
I danced around the kitchen, and tricked them into eating
And sang till my throat was sore
And even though I wanted to sit down and cry
I tried to be patient when they wanted more.
I waited all day for this family time
But when it came it just messed with my head,
And I felt so bad that all I could think,
Was how long until I could ship them to bed
I glanced at the clock, another hour to go
So I gave them dessert to pass time
My son was ecstatic as I sat down on the floor
and waited for the hour to chime
And I was sad that it seemed that they all were like this
Each day just blurred into the next
And I wondered when I was going to make big memories
Days that stood out from the rest
I wondered which today's would be part of tomorrow
Which parts they’d take with when a new sun showed its face
Or which days of their lives they’d never recall
Hazy memories stored in some forgotten place.
And it made me sad all through their bath
Where we blew bubbles and tickled and splashed
And after that they got dressed and jumped on my bed
And made their tired old mommy laugh
It seemed so depressing, yet another evening
With no strength to make memories for keeps.
Instead trying to smile during their nightly routine
And waiting till they were asleep.
And when they became quiet later,
One in my arms, and my shoulder supporting the other one’s head
I kissed their cheeks and hugged them tight
And brought them each to their own beds.
I worried about those memories,
When we’d make them and what they would be.
Would they be of happy times of laughter and joy
Or of a tired and cranky old me.
And then my son called from deep in his dreams
He woke up for one last hug good night.
He snuggled up to me close and kissed me so cute
And I too held on to him tight.
Then I knew suddenly that as blurry as they get
Each night helps to build a new dawn
And that the hugs and the laughs and the bubbles we splashed
Will help us all keep moving on
And my daughter smiled in her sleep, don’t know what she was dreaming
But my evening lost some of its gloom
I felt so much lighter after that hug and her grin
And felt happy as I left their room
I realized its not the big memories but the little moments,
Not the big days but just small tiny parts
Those are the minutes that last through the tomorrows,
Nestled somewhere in their little hearts.
So I vowed to make more of the today’s.
Hug tighter, smile bigger, laugh real
To stop worrying about the memories I wanted to make
And to love the precious moments we steal.